Yo, yo I live for Torn, it's the life I choose, But you diss wi' me faction, you gonna lose, We got ranked wars, civil wars, faction wars, actual wars, on the decline, are the fake wars, Boogie chasin' down the real whores.
What's with the personals, that stuffs real messed up, All I see is catfish and most of that's rough. I understand you ladies, you wanna land yourself a spouse, squattin' in a PI or at least a better house.
But it's not just Torn, it's your Facebook, your Twitter, your Instagram, your I wanna be noticed, but it's not really who I am. Stop injecting yourselves, start projecting yourselves, show's the real you, You all look the same, ain't that a shame, but whatcha goin' to do,
Sorry if I offend, that really wasn't my intention, I just think your self esteem warrants some attention, possible intervention.
Don't like what I say, s'okay, carry on, look like a duck, 'Member I'ys just spittin', I don't give a ______.
Walkin' round Gatlin with GAK on my back, you can thank bogie for that. I impressed bogie with a map, now I gotta impress bogie with a rap. While I wrap this present with some wrapping paper I'm an expert CT --- Map Maker. But I'm not Santa, I'm the Grinch on Christmas. If you don't believe me you can check my wishlist.
I want a pair of shoes, a parachute, Some parachute pants and a parrot with shoes. I want four hot babes in their bathing suits. I want a PS2 with crash bandicoot. I want a one legged woman who's a prostitute. I want a brand new Ruger with execute. I want an evil goose I can persecute. And a WoW account with max attributes.
I wanna be the prosecutor of your executor. I want Chedburn's mom but a little cuter. I want an all black cat that's spayed or neutered. And a level 5 Scrooge that's not been looted.
That's my list, that's the task, If you didn't like it you can kiss my ass, Where's my trophy, where's my mask. I'm all outta eggnog, I'mma pour another glass. Bitch
Alright, we concede, this was by far the highest quality of submissions of all the Christmas contests, to the point where we've had a joint 2nd and a joint third - maybe we will do some more rap stuff - but expect to also show off some other talent at the same time! We want to ensure those willing to put the effort in are the ones submitting, and it showed here! We laughed, we cried, in some cases we cringed, but by the end of it our winner was a clear choice.
Please only post your submission to this competition / event here. Any discussion, comments or unacceptable entries will be deleted by staff. Make sure you have carefully checked the entry rules to ensure your post will be allowed.