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Forum Main>>Fun & Games>> Corrupt - A - Wish
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Khomception

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Posted on Sat May 11, 2013 16:20:21
Granted, you could only fast forward or rewind time by 3 seconds.
I wish I had more sleep.

Last Edited: Mon May 13, 2013 20:46:54
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GypsyTears

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Posted on Tue May 14, 2013 18:04:09
Granted!

Your desperate attempt to gain more sleep has been done! *poof*

You sleep like Rip Van Winkle but still, you don't feel rested, recuperated or relaxed. You float hopelessly in a clouded daze.


I wish that my skin would never be too dry or too moist.

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Danny_

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Posted on Fri May 17, 2013 22:50:43
Granted, it now switches colours to horribly "clash" with whatever you are wearing though...


I wish for something I could really use...

Meet my improved Private Island staff on my profile... ^^
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30613383061338
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Posted on Fri May 17, 2013 22:56:21
granted you get a dildo

lol

i wish for somethig i can hit a person with:*

dq4j.jpg
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Danny_

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Posted on Fri May 17, 2013 23:00:06
What Am I supposed to do with a dildo?! I'm a straight guy


Granted, you have an inflatable hammer, air not included...


I wish for a hot knife in my butter...

Meet my improved Private Island staff on my profile... ^^
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Bueno_Excelente

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Posted on Sun May 19, 2013 01:47:08

Granted! Unfortunately, your new butter knife has a dildo hilt.

DSC03047.JPG

I wish for a delicious plate of spaghetti and meatballs.


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GypsyTears

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Posted on Sun May 19, 2013 06:40:03
Granted!

This truly is a masterpiece. The meatballs are so tender and the pasta just past al dente. No limp noodles for you.

As I was concocting the sauce, I couldn't help but taste it over and over again. I couldn't help but bite the wooden spoon on a couple of occasions.

The plating was done with perfection, it was as if I had a magic touch. Not one drop of sauce landed on the edge of the white platter but I have to admit that I did drip a little on my thumb. As I licked the hot sauce off of my thumb, I had gotten a sudden and uncontrollable urge to get more of this sauce.

I started with the pasta. I promise that I didn't bite once, I just twirled up a small mouthful and sucked all the sauce off of it and placed the noodles back on the plate.
It worked pretty well and I had an insatiable appetite for this sauce for some reason, so I continued with sucking off all the sauce from the pasta until only meaty sauce-covered balls.

I'm sure at this point you can just imagine what happened next.
You got it, my dog jumped up on me, almost knocked the entire plate down but only the balls hit the floor and were partially eaten by that bad boy before I was able to retrieve the remnants. Thankfully, most of his good teeth are missing at his age. So he mostly just gummed the balls.

I do hope that you enjoy the plate of spaghetti and meatballs that has been carefully made, tested and approved by this genie.


I wish for a new fresh scent that will wow all of those that get a whiff.


2iw9kkk.png
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Slick808

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Posted on Sun May 19, 2013 09:58:50
Granted!!

Due to the incredibly awesome efficiency of USPS you receive a plain box in the mail 3 week later. (Should have wished for FEDEX delivery. hehe)

As you rip open the package, you find a beautiful purple bottle. As you uncork the bottle, your sense of smell is assaulted by the wondrous fumes of Gardenia, mixed with a slight tinge of ocean air off the Pacific ocean and an albeit slight but undeniably hearty waft of SPAM.

You splash it on and tackle your errands of the day. As you get deeper into your chores, you realize that this shit, although smelling incredible is getting stronger as the day wears on. Before you know, you have a posse of retired, horny men who have decided to make their final resting places, yep you guessed it, right next to the lake.

You manage to lose them somewhere near Satin's castle, as that is how far you had to go to get rid of these geriatric stalkers, and haul ass home.

As you get home, you head to the kitchen and notice that you forgot to put the top back onto the bottle. A strange noise comes from the day room and you grab a broom to investigate. You find a baby black bear rolling through the laundry ( You were so overwhelmed by the amazing concoction, you spilled some all over the counter. When you wiped it, you threw the hand towel with the rest of the laundry as doing the wash was on your to-do list.) He must have been hungry. After you coax the bear out of the house, you sit on the couch.

Strangely, after all of the crazy events of the day, you begin missing, more than normal, a far away place. Never fear though my love, you will always have that bottle and Slick808 stalking you in these very forums reminding you that, it will always be here waiting for you to return.

I wish for a picturesque, perfectly made, free of defects with no bacteria or foreign objects, Double Double, Animal Style, with extra fries and a strawberry milkshake while having my way with Salma Hayek!

Last Edited: Sun May 19, 2013 10:00:23
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Danny_

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Posted on Sun May 19, 2013 13:19:11
Granted, you have a Salma Hayek blow up doll filled with strawberry milkshake and covered in a double double extra amount of fries in an animal sexual position. All perfectly free of defects and clean...
Though there are some very hungry people around who like some of that too...


I wish I could turn people into life size golden statues, though I can also turn them back into humans again if I want...

Meet my improved Private Island staff on my profile... ^^
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GayBadBoy

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Posted on Wed May 22, 2013 00:28:54
The ever deafening Genie grants what he thinks was your request!

Granted but your "golden statute" of limitations is over before you can cast one!

Statute-editorial-640x562.jpg

Damn statutes... I wish to know why laws are so fickle!

Last Edited: Wed May 22, 2013 00:30:07
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0ffline
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Posted on Wed May 22, 2013 02:52:28
Granted! The answer is simple: mobile vulgus

35buwrm.jpg

Thugs and hooligans, the lot! A far cry from the days of discipline on the high seas!!!!

2wrg7mb.jpg2sal6zc.jpg and the of9j7r.jpg!!!!!!



I wish for a double entendre double entendre

http://i44.tinypic.com/n15npe.png

^^ Only one left in stock!

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Danny_

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Posted on Wed May 22, 2013 13:48:59
A quadruple entendre?! I'm interested what someone will make of that... ^^

Meet my improved Private Island staff on my profile... ^^
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mr_32

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Posted on Wed May 22, 2013 15:37:00
I wish i had a P.I ...were i could relax all day

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GayBadBoy

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Posted on Fri May 24, 2013 17:23:26
The Ever Busy Genie puts down his can he is using busy from his work

thats-a-lot-of-double-entendre-10184.jpg

and puts stops to turn off his turntable playing one of his favorite albums 12 Inches of Snow:

album-12-inches-of-snow.jpg

And says "I am doubly doubly sure you can't handle that", but I grant you these words of wisdom:

"If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"


I wish to know the answer to that question by the way incase you didn't get it.

Last Edited: Fri May 24, 2013 18:17:28
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TheDude3000

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Posted on Sun Jun 16, 2013 00:50:36
Granted!

However, you cannot handle the truth so you commit suicide.

I wish to have friends from another planet.

[url=http://www.mindistortion.tv/iwantyoursoul/?i_am=Nate Silva]don't click this link...[/url]
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GypsyTears

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Posted on Sun Jun 16, 2013 01:32:20
GBB, Bueno AND 0ffline all on the same page!
I feel tears welling up.

Granted,

You have a group to hang with on the other planet. It's Saturday night sleepover night and there has been a special treat set up just for you.
Anal probes are so yesterday and mostly obsolete but a few collectors have saved theirs and lucky you, the family of the most mouthy of aliens has found an antique.

Unsure of the way to actually use these, your young "friends" use the most obvious orifice to probe you. These are just kids and they only know from the stories that these were once used on humans, but nobody remembers hearing about gagging and choking noises in the old stories.

Brainy alien pushes the other kids out of the way and goes for your nose. The pressure in your sinuses and behind your eyes is blinding but since your mouth is available you explain to your buds that the proper use of this instrument belongs elsewhere.

The kids zap you back home. You are no longer able to attend sleepovers and the communication between you and the group has become uncomfortable and awkward.

Just like here on Earth, you are once again all isolated and alone.


I wish that I had a 10 gallon hat, a pair of worn leather chaps and a faithful steed.

2iw9kkk.png
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Bionic_Commando
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Posted on Sun Jun 16, 2013 06:35:56
Granted! You'll get it some day!

I wish that I have the money to buy another Donator pack because it is going to end!



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GayBadBoy

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Posted on Wed Jun 19, 2013 17:56:51
The most evil of Corruptible Genies has shown disfavor for your perversion of the art!

Your money goes to buy GypsyTears a Donator Pack for not corrupting her wish!

";You have just sent GypsyTears a Donator Pack!"

And instead of giving her the 10 Gallon Hat you you were supposed to provide, the Evil Corruptible Genie has an ear infection and gives you 10 Gallon Hat Hare!

POOF!

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(;Image Not Available due to Wonky System issues);

Wow I sure wish that Genie could get a hearing aid!



Last Edited: Wed Jun 19, 2013 18:02:18
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0ffline
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Posted on Wed Jun 19, 2013 18:18:53
By GayBadBoy [158696]
The most evil of Corruptible Genies has shown disfavor for your perversion of the art!

Your money goes to buy GypsyTears a Donator Pack for not corrupting her wish!

";;You have just sent GypsyTears a Donator Pack!";

And instead of giving her the 10 Gallon Hat you you were supposed to provide, the Evil Corruptible Genie has an ear infection and gives you 10 Gallon Hat Hare!

POOF!

elo-134_1z.jpg
(;;Image Not Available due to Wonky System issues);;

Wow I sure wish that Genie could get a hearing aid!



Your wish is:;; GRANTED!!!!!

AS OUR GENIE IS NO SPRING CHICKEN, AND ON ACCOUNT OF THE LIMITED PROVISIONS OF MEDICARE, THE GENIE SOLICITS THE HELP OF THE DEVOTED GIRLFRIDAY, WHO IS ONLY TO EAGER TO ASSIST.

ANY SOUNDS WITHIN THE GEENIES PROXIMITY A VERBATIM ITTERATION OR DESCRIPTION IS ALMOST INSTANTLY YELLED INTO HIS/HER (;;That';s Genies for ya);; GOOD EAR AS LOUD AS POSSIBLE. IN TIME, THE GENIE BEGINS TO CALL HIS HEARING AID WHAT HE BELIEVES TO BE A TERM OF ENDEARMENT:;; OLD YELLER.

REGRETABLY, GIVEN HIS POOR EYESIGHT AS WELL AS HEARING, GENIE IS OBLIVIOUS TO THE FACT THAT HIS ";OLD YELLER"; HAS LONG SUFFERED FROM LIVER FAILURE, AND THE ACCOMPANYING JAUNDICE IS SOMETHING FOR WHICH GIRLFRIDAY IS MORE THAN A LITTLE SENSITIVE! SHE IMMEDIATLY REVOKES HER SERVICES. And begins mumbling as well as cleaning her toes with the Genie';s toothbrush.

The genie contracts Genigivitis, and begins to suffer hemoraging teeth loss, becoming heavilly reliant on greek style yogurt (;;Down Buenno! Down!!!!);;.

Toothless, deaf, and blind, the genie disovers a world of simple pleasures and a hightenend sense of tactile sensitivity. This newfound skill is evident by his/her sudden interest in sand paper and origami, leading to magnificently disturbing 40 grit thongs.


Otherwise, you know, things actually go ok.







I wish for a Deer. A demale feer.

Last Edited: Wed Jun 19, 2013 18:20:18
http://i44.tinypic.com/n15npe.png

^^ Only one left in stock!

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GypsyTears

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Posted on Mon Jul 01, 2013 19:12:22
d'oh

Granted!

You have been given the most emasculated feer found to date! He requires an ample supply of Ben & Jerry pints, cases of Kleenex, has a need to watch the Lifetime network and has Dr. Phil on speed dial.

When the poor bastard cries, it is barely audible to humans, but dogs howl incessantly and feral cats are drawn to your doorstep.


I wish for an air conditioning unit that creates a wind chill factor.



2iw9kkk.png
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1718784
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Posted on Tue Jul 02, 2013 06:17:47
Granted, however, the aforementioned air conditioner requires 57 D batteries... "Why do these bastards have to make everything so expensive!" You mumble as you head to the local convenience store for the batteries. Just as you are getting out of your car a large chunk of frozen fecal matter plummets from the sky and nails you in the head, upon receiving this injury you forget what you were doing and get back in your car to start the long journey home. Just as you are pulling into your driveway you remember that you left the stove on, you come home to find that your house has burned to the ground. The only thing that survived the fire was your heavy duty air conditioner.. Congrats.

I wish I had a hot wife.

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Bueno_Excelente

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Posted on Wed Jul 03, 2013 06:21:21

I wish I had a hot wife.


Granted, my friend... but let me just point out that in most Western cultures there are far less dire legal repercussions if you just divorce her.

I wish for a safety flag to place on GypsyTears' refrigerator nipples. So no one loses an eye, yes?



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Bueno_Excelente

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Posted on Mon Jul 22, 2013 23:43:12

I find it disturbing that no one seems to be able to corrupt a wish that involves icy hard nipples.


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Danny_

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Posted on Tue Jul 23, 2013 06:28:47
By Bueno_Excelente [34014]

I find it disturbing that no one seems to be able to corrupt a wish that involves icy hard nipples.


Like icy hard nipples on some ugly broad like yourself?

Meet my improved Private Island staff on my profile... ^^
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Bueno_Excelente

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Posted on Wed Jul 24, 2013 00:20:48

LIES. I haven't been a broad in ages.

Besides, that isn't a wish corruption.


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0ffline
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Posted on Wed Jul 24, 2013 00:33:31
By Bueno_Excelente [34014]

I wish I had a hot wife.


Granted, my friend... but let me just point out that in most Western cultures there are far less dire legal repercussions if you just divorce her.

I wish for a safety flag to place on GypsyTears' refrigerator nipples. So no one loses an eye, yes?



Others gawked in quasi-aroused amazement while you perished within your deepest thoughts:

"They are as though the Guns of Navarone, and every man, her majesty's friggate in treacherous waters. Something MUST be done..."

Drifting from your thoughts to the present, the urgency of the moment takes hold. You dash up the street to the holistic vegan cafe / Bakery /Bikram Yoga and Laundrette (Genius!). Pulling one of the sustainable bamboo chairs from a nearby table, you perch above it so as to retrieve a fistfull of the colourful Tibetan prayer flags that wave gingerly from the storefront awning.

"Hey you asshole, that's for Free Tibet!!!!" echoes behind you as you plod down the sidewalk towards the mammoth tee-tons of pedestrian peril that are GypsyTears' probiscous-like areolae, perched menacingly at the forefront of her ample bussom.


"For GOD's sake, woman!" you bellow while quickly festooning her dangerously pointy balloonings with the heartfelt prayers of Trustafarians both near, and afar.

The neighbourhood's elder statesmen look on from their balconies, nodding approvingly:

"well, really, it is about time someone did something..."

A fortnight later you stand before your troop with glee as your proudly accept your "Safety First!" merrit badge, before returning to your hotel room to shoot ungodly amounts of Tar Heroin with a minor celebrity.




2qlgylf.jpg

I wish for a new dawn, on a new page! (as a back up, maybe some verb tense agreement would be helpful too)

Last Edited: Wed Jul 24, 2013 00:35:18
http://i44.tinypic.com/n15npe.png

^^ Only one left in stock!

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Danny_

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Posted on Wed Jul 24, 2013 12:01:29
By 0ffline [1372001]
I wish for a new dawn, on a new page! (as a back up, maybe some verb tense agreement would be helpful too)


Wut?!

Meet my improved Private Island staff on my profile... ^^
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0ffline
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Posted on Wed Jul 24, 2013 14:28:10
By Danny_ [75604]
By 0ffline [1372001]
I wish for a new dawn, on a new page! (as a back up, maybe some verb tense agreement would be helpful too)


Wut?!


Calgon, take me away!

http://i44.tinypic.com/n15npe.png

^^ Only one left in stock!

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Danny_

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Posted on Wed Jul 24, 2013 15:04:46
By 0ffline [1372001]
By Danny_ [75604]
By 0ffline [1372001]
I wish for a new dawn, on a new page! (as a back up, maybe some verb tense agreement would be helpful too)


Wut?!


Calgon, take me away!


I still don't get it...

Meet my improved Private Island staff on my profile... ^^
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0ffline
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Posted on Wed Jul 24, 2013 15:13:38
By Danny_ [75604]
By 0ffline [1372001]
By Danny_ [75604]
By 0ffline [1372001]
I wish for a new dawn, on a new page! (as a back up, maybe some verb tense agreement would be helpful too)


Wut?!


Calgon, take me away!


I still don't get it...


cos28.jpg

By 0ffline [1372001]
By Bueno_Excelente [34014]

I wish I had a hot wife.


Granted, my friend... but let me just point out that in most Western cultures there are far less dire legal repercussions if you just divorce her.

I wish for a safety flag to place on GypsyTears' refrigerator nipples. So no one loses an eye, yes?



Others gawked in quasi-aroused amazement while you perished within your deepest thoughts:

"They are as though the Guns of Navarone, and every man, her majesty's friggate in treacherous waters. Something MUST be done..."

Drifting from your thoughts to the present, the urgency of the moment takes hold. You dash up the street to the holistic vegan cafe / Bakery /Bikram Yoga and Laundrette (Genius!). Pulling one of the sustainable bamboo chairs from a nearby table, you perch above it so as to retrieve a fistfull of the colourful Tibetan prayer flags that wave gingerly from the storefront awning.

"Hey you asshole, that's for Free Tibet!!!!" echoes behind you as you plod down the sidewalk towards the mammoth tee-tons of pedestrian peril that are GypsyTears' probiscous-like areolae, perched menacingly at the forefront of her ample bussom.


"For GOD's sake, woman!" you bellow while quickly festooning her dangerously pointy balloonings with the heartfelt prayers of Trustafarians both near, and afar.

The neighbourhood's elder statesmen look on from their balconies, nodding approvingly:

"well, really, it is about time someone did something..."

A fortnight later you stand before your troop with glee as your proudly accept your "Safety First!" merrit badge, before returning to your hotel room to shoot ungodly amounts of Tar Heroin with a minor celebrity.




2qlgylf.jpg

I wish for a new dawn, on a new page! (as a back up, maybe some verb tense agreement would be helpful too)



Last Edited: Wed Jul 24, 2013 17:11:15
http://i44.tinypic.com/n15npe.png

^^ Only one left in stock!

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