Granted but back then you forgot to pay your energy bills so you got your internet cut off and you forgot about the game until years later and you find it again but still have to start all over again. Mwhahaha *cough*
I wish my girlfriend was here now.... (This'll be interesting)
Granted! She is, sorta, in that she's in the room next door giving Buenno a post-coital foot rub, washing his feet with her tears of utter bliss and adoration. She completely forgot of your existence around the time Buenno instructed her in the merits of the Yogic position of " downward facing dog ". Buenno completely forgets of her existence later today while enjoying a particularly well prepared "moons over my hammy" at Denny's.
By 636339 [636339]
Granted! She is, sorta, in that she's in the room next door giving Buenno a post-coital foot rub, washing his feet with her tears of utter bliss and adoration. She completely forgot of your existence around the time Buenno instructed her in the merits of the Yogic position of " downward facing dog ". Buenno completely forgets of her existence later today while enjoying a particularly well prepared "moons over my hammy" at Denny's.
I wish for a Marxist Beard
Granted! But while admiring your new beard in the mirror, you accidentally trip over your cat. You fall backwards, grabbing an extension cord on the way down. THis is attached to a fan which gets caught in your beard. You die.
Your air guitar achievements are recognized world-wide. One day while practicing you strain your tendons too hard and end up in traction, unable to practice for weeks on end. Your fans become dejected and turn to your competition who ends up taking all your record contracts that you could have earned.
Granted, your wish is completely true to the end. You lose your possessions, friends, family, clothes, your very being. You are entered into a state of limbo where you feel and sense everything but can do nothing but stare into the dark abyss and wait for your death, which will never come since death is something.
Granted! You wake up in the morning and walk out your front door, noticing what appears to be a sudden eclipse but what in actuality is the massive shadow of everything good falling from the heavens directly overhead! You are crushed by the falling corpses of the entire Kardashian family.
Granted but he costs a lot of money, leaving you skint, he also runs off with any partners you may have and spreads rumors about you, leaving you without friends.
Granted, your master is a very rich and successful businessman that doesnt anything from you but look like a hot girl and do you every night... You as a genie MUST obey or be destroyed.
Granted, but during a curse you accidentally curse yourself with a curse that meant you couldn't remove any curses. Saying "Curses!" you accidentally kill yourself.
Granted, al the poo building up is making him very angry at you and always attacks you.
Then one time when he is attacking you. He "pops", spreading poo everywhere...
Granted, but the stock markets crash and everyone hates you. Then the angry citizens start a riot angered by the gold statue of you and end up klling you.
Granted, but just as a neighborhood street gang sees you in this shirt, the color of their rivals, they try to come after you and maul you for the shirt.
The doorbell rings and someone had left you a big bag of marshmallows. You close the door, not giving it another though, and begin to devour the bag. Three minutes later the bag is gone and you are not feeling so hot. You tummy starts to rumble as you quickly make your way to the bathroom. You sit on the toilet and think to yourself that eating the whole bag was not such a great idea.
20 minutes later and still on the toilet, you start to make turtle heads, but that's it. Looks like you will need some medicine to help you with your issue. You call the family physician, but he is not in. Dr. Noglove is the on call doctor and needs you to come in immediately. He explains that there is no time for medicine and recommends that he goes in manually.
I wish for a water bed.
No trees were harmed during the creation of this message. It’s made from a blend of elephant tusk and dolphin meat.
After a few minutes, you start getting this feeling that something just isn't right. "Am I wetting my pants?", you ask yourself. You turn over and to your horror find out that the supplier stapled one of their tags to the bed causing an interminably slow leak. Guess it's off back to the shop for you.
I wish I had a huge tree in the yard so I could build a tree house
Granted, but you decided to build it while drunk in one of your 'THIS'LL BE GOOD' moments and make it of bad quality. The first time in it, a small bit of wind causes the treehouse to fall and you with it. You smash into the floor on your back, breaking bones and bruising more then just your physical body. But in the flash of lightening and the cracking of thunder, a shaft of wood is shown, flying downwards and sliding through your chest like a warm knife through butter. You do not live to see the Morning.
I wish i could write gripping and interesting Literature.
You pull out a few of your favorite pencils and sit down at the desk. You gaze at the cover of your "Dora the Explorer" note book for inspiration. In no time at all, you open to a fresh page and begin to write about 18th century artifacts.
You are deep into you thoughts, and the words are flowing, you soon to have free written 5 pages of top notch material. This stuff is golden, so informational, interesting and easy to read you are thinking about submitting the article to the TC newspaper and share the masterpiece with the whole community, and hell, cash in on a few points while you were at it.
You summit it and wait patiently for a response. Seems that it is a toss up between yours and "Offline '636339' [636339]" paper on "Bring back the Dongs" Sadly enough, they had chosen Offline's article, and he is issued surprise bonus points.
I guess you were writing for the wrong audience.
I wish I had a magic carpet.
No trees were harmed during the creation of this message. It’s made from a blend of elephant tusk and dolphin meat.
Granted. You tried to fly on the carpet. But it didn't seem to work. So you tried again but saying ALAKAZAM! Well, it still didn't work. So you punched the carpet to release your anger. But suddenly the carpet traveled back in time,with you on it. Guess where you are...
You're in the Roman times, as a gladiator.
You hug one and it doesn't blow up. Oh joy. The hissing sound is a bit irritating though.
As you're in a dark alley and creepers are known to spawn in dimly lit locations, this one starts spawning right there while you're hugging it.
Soon you have hundreds of them all wanting a hug from you. The hissing sound is starting to drive you a little insane.
You try and let go of the one you hugged but it doesn't want you to. It hugs harder causing shortness of breath. Soon they're all in on the action hugging you from every direction. The hissing sound is driving them into a frenzy.
When they eventually realise that you're not hugging them back, they slowly release you and let your lifeless body slump to the ground.
Granted but being your wife in game, I'm very quick to notice you have this ability, taking it for myself and floating on top of your head, just to be a bitch.
You create a facebook account. Hmm, now to find some friends.
You find some friends, some enemies too, but you have more friends than enemies, so that's all good.
You start poking them, but none poke back. "What's up with that?", you ask yourself. You soon run out of friends to poke, and as they haven't poked back, you're stuck with your inability to poke anyone again.
Granted, NASA knocks on your door and says that you won their special lottery and you get live in a space station.
You barely pass all their preliminary tests and hop on the space shuttle.
Arriving on the space station, you have lots of fun in the weightless environment.
After a few days, an unforeseen meteor shower destroys the space station. You die in the vacuum of space as your head explodes due to the air inside trying to get out...
I wish I could fly anywhere I want and survive in the vacuum of space...
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